Tag Archives: hurt

When God Cleans You With Steel Wool

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Last week was rough. The following is a snapshot into my journal last Tuesday.


“Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;
wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Let me hear joy and gladness,
let the bones that You have broken rejoice.”
-Psalm 51:7-8

Sometimes it feels like God is cleaning me with steel wool instead of the cotton washcloths I prefer.

As I write this, my heart aches. I’m crying and hurting. I feel broken by longings and unsaid words and independent realities and the delay of good dreams. 

“I know, O Lord, that Your rules are righteous, and that in faithfulness You have afflicted me. Let Your steadfast love comfort me according to Your promise to Your servant. Let Your mercy come to me, that I may live; for Your law is my delight.” -Psalm 119:75-77

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Monday Morning Munch No. 119 – When You Despise the Answers God Give

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Saturday morning I was reading the Psalms and praying God would save so many people I love.

Praying God would redeem them. Break them down. Cleanse out all their idols. Give them new hearts. Make them new creations. Add their voices to the song that never ends. Raise them up to be holy and faithful laborers. Cause them to look and live.

“Whatever it takes, God. Whatever it takes.”

Have you prayed that before? I would venture to say most people have. We pray it at our church often because it’s obvious that, in the cost/benefit analysis of God’s grace-driven salvation, the benefits far outweigh any cost we could be asked to pay. In light of what Jesus has done, nothing we could ever do is enough to earn God’s favor and nothing He asks of us would be too much. As Elisabeth Elliot says, “He supplies the material for sacrifice.” And the sacrifice, if initiated and prompted by a holy Father, is always worth it.

But what if we pray “whatever it takes” with all our well-intentioned heart and then despise the “whatever” when it comes?

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